I'm on a High!

Here we go again. Going back to first place I had the courage to travel solo. Going back to the time when I had to courage to take the step forward after my surgery. Going back to the person I wish I bet my future with. It was not even solo before since I was with my friend then went on out separate trips. It was just a step forward but a dozen of strides back, left, and right. I am lost as I had been put together. Now, a lot has changed. Six years apart. One pandemic. Thousands of life lessons. Few successes and more failures. Millions of people have passed. I’m still alone in the room. But, I don’t have to wait for anyone to come. I’m still alone in the room. But, I’m still carefree as my heart desires. I’m still alone in the room. But, I’m not in awe of everything. But, I have you - you who have helped me through the nights I wish I din’t pour my heart out. jt But, I have you - you who believed in me even though I’m no one near perfect. mm But, I have you - you who ...

Sitting by the window. Seeing the leaves sway down with the wind. Waiting for the sun rays to hurt a little less. Then, the rain drops finally came. And the darkness ran over. It was always like this for the past months. It's almost a year and I can still remember how jumpy I was knowing a possibility of a lockdown. I can almost see green everywhere - not the green that I wanted but some green I've fallen in love with along the way. I travelled from QC to home and decided it's not gonna work. I hoped it was just weeks but turned into months. That was probably the best-and-worst decision I made in my life. Like ever. Now looking ahead, it's like the same thing all over again. We're not slowly moving forward. We're squirming. Sitting by the window. Seeing the leaves sway down with the wind. Waiting for the sun rays to hurt a little less. Then, the rain drops finally came. And the darkness will be over.